Another month in the Philippines

Dear Friends,

Today as we celebrate the 1 year anniversary of this clinic being open, we had our 659th birth! As I reflect on the past year I can’t help but be overwhelmed by God’s faithfulness. This year has come with many challenges as we pioneer something new, but I know that God’s hand has been ever present as he’s guided us through valleys and over mountains!

It was a Sunday morning at around 10 am when Sarah came to me in a panicked voice and said “I can’t find heart tones”. She was checking in a new labor that had just come into our clinic. The lady’s name was Johna, 22 years old and in labor with her 4th child. She had been to our clinic for one prenatal in August and came now in active labor. I attempted to find fetal heart tones and couldn’t hear them at all. I had a sense in my spirit that this baby was not going to live, yet I had a peace that passed understanding. The next hours were intense and difficult as 15 minutes later Johna delivered a baby girl, Stefany, born without a heart beat. We tried resuscitating her for the first few minutes but there was no response. Stefany was already safe in the arms of Jesus. We spent the next hours grieving with Johna and her husband, Ray. They had already experienced this once with their firstborn. Johna’s first pregnancy was twins. The first twin was born crying and grew up to be a healthy 4-year-old. The second one was a still birth. She had another child after that set of twins and now had this baby. Johna’s grief was deep. As we heard this mother sob over another lost child we knew that a part of her was lost as well. We had the privilege, as hard as it was, of walking through this journey with them; comforting them in their grief, praying for the peace of God to reign in their lives.

That night our team gathered together and prayed and worshiped. We sang together “For You are Good”. It was really challenging for me to sing that. To chose to say “God is still good”.

Later that day I had another birth that wasn’t exactly normal… another baby that needed some resuscitation. As I was thinking about it later I was pretty upset that the birth had been that way. I was really praying for a normal birth as the trauma from Johna’s birth was still so fresh. But as I reflected on it God really spoke to me. He reminded me of the miracle of life. I realized that both of those births could have had the same outcomes, had it not been for the grace and miracle of God. He breathed life into that second baby. Within minutes she was screaming and crying, kicking and breathing. That is a miracle. Each precious one is a miracle. I won’t ever understand why one lives and one dies. All I can do is put my trust in a God who is sovereign, who gives life and takes it away.

Walking this journey with Johna and Ray was just one of the experiences that I had this past month. The other families that have been really close to my heart are Carolina and Vicki’s families (the families that collect recycling from us). The first couple weeks I was back I spent a lot of time with them, chatting, playing with their kids, and just hanging out together. We had a lot of conversations about poverty, both here and around the world. One day they asked me if there were poor in Canada. I told them that there was but they couldn’t live in the same sort of shacks because of the cold and the need for heating. They had never heard of heating before. I was trying to explain it to them and finally said “just like airconditioning but it blows hot air”. Suddenly they got it! J They proceeded to ask me more questions about the poor and about my family. Just when I felt like they understood that we had poor just on a different scale they asked me, “so do your brothers and sisters collect garbage so they can eat?” I was suddenly aware that they really have no idea how great the extremes are!

A couple days later Ate Carolina came to the clinic saying one of her children was in the hospital, diagnosed with appendicitis. I spent the next hours with them at the hospital. Finally one of the doctors that did an evaluation said “this doesn’t seem like appendicitis”. He closed the curtains, did an exam and came out with a tapeworm over a foot long!!! The dr. wrote us a few prescriptions for deworming and sent us on our way.

A couple weeks later more of the children were hospitalized. This time they had diarrhea and were vomiting. This flu should have been something easy for their bodies to fight, but because they are already malnourished and compromised this flu was enough to knock them out completely. They were dehydrated and weak, on IV’s and antibiotics. Carolina and Vicki came to the clinic to tell me. They were pretty upset and felt helpless as they didn’t have any money for even the most basic care. I went with them to the hospital and spent the next hours doing everything from talking to the doctors, paying the laboratory fees, buying medicines and getting them lunch! It was an extremely exhausting day, I think emotionally more than anything. I was very aware that without this basic medical treatment these little children could literally die. Diarrhea is one of the top 2 killers of children in the third world. Why? Because they are so malnourished and already compromised that their body can’t fight a typical flu bug. The heaviness of injustice felt great. Things seem unfair when they are denied privileges and luxuries that we have, but when they are denied basic rights like medical care and a meal, the injustice seems too overwhelming!

It seems like every day I am here I am more aware of the depths of injustice. At times I am thankful for the opportunity to see things so deeply. Other times I just want to retreat and not see it at all. I struggle daily with the questions “how can I help? How can I truly make a difference?” I am praying that God will direct and channel this deep passion that is growing within me, to places that can most effectively make an impact on this dying world!

Please continue to pray for Ate Vicki and Ate Carolina’s families. For health and for job opportunities! We’ve been able to hire their husbands to scrape paint and help with basic construction for a few days this month. As of this week we hired Ate Carolina 3 days each week to help clean at the clinic. She is truly overwhelmed and blessed by this opportunity.

God is beginning to show me spiritual fruit of the ministry we are a part of here. One day this month one of the students brought me an ultrasound diagnosing her patients’ baby with severe hydrocephaly, incompatible with life. We ended up having an extensive time with her and a precious Filipina friend of mine, explaining to her the condition of her baby and at the same time sharing God’s amazing grace and mercy. Through this time she asked Jesus to be Lord of her life and declared Him sovereign in the midst of all she was going through. It was truly a privilege to be there as she accepted and recognized the deep love of her heavenly father. As she prayed we declared over her forgiveness, freedom, worthiness, and acceptance. Each time we prayed these things she cried “thank you Jesus, thank you Jesus”. It was so beautiful to see something so deep and so sincere. Marichu did have her baby a little less than a week later. He lived 4 days before he, also, went home to be with Jesus. But Marichu did not grieve as someone in the world because she was able to grieve with hope, knowing her heavenly father!

Thank you for your prayers and support. Please pray for the staff and students at the clinic; for endurance and strength dealing with our busy schedules, heavy patient load and constant intensities. Please continue to pray for Filipina midwives as we have a critical need for them right now. And continue to pray for our precious patients. That they may know the love of God and truly see Him as their provider!

Love Nicole